TimeIt’s hard enough being Foster Parents, but what I find even harder is having to watch the biological parents not prioritizing the re-unification with their children as being the most important thing in their lives!     —   Written by: Anonymous

I get the impression that they don’t realizing how much precious time is ticking past … every day turns into a week, every week turns into a month, months turns into years – Mom / Dad your wasted time has already turned into four years!   Wasted time that you will NEVER be able to get back.

During those four years, you have been together and split up just as many times.  When I take your children for their monthly visits (play sessions), I hear  how you  have sorted your lives out, found new jobs (the 7th that we know off) and that you have the children’s rooms all made up and waiting for them at your new home (about 6 homes later)

What about your children?  How long will this process of ‘you’re growing up’ as parents still take?  Do you really think that after your children have grown up from babies into pre-schoolers, being raised by other  ‘parents’ , that you will be able to just magically flick a wand and erase the last four years from their lives?  Do you truly expect them to just forgive and forget that YOU have made wrong decisions that have kept you out of their lives? How do you think they are affected by not knowing what tomorrow brings? Will they stay where they are or will they go back to live with you?

My heart aches to think that eventually these precious children will turn 18; having aged out in the system, with no stable foundation of roots in knowing this is where I will always stay.  Mom / Dad are this truly the life you have to offer for your children?  A life of uncertainty of never knowing what tomorrow might bring?

PLEASE parents:  Either make your children your number one priority;  or love them so much that you are willing to give them up!  But please decide — before time leaves them without a real future or a secure past!

Written by: Anonymous


About Helouise Steenkamp

I'm a 45 plus, Devoted Wife and Mother. Adonai has blessed us with two Amazingly Wonderful Sons. We have had the privilege of being Place of Safety parents for 1 1/2 years and there after foster parents to a Darling Princess for 5 years. She was reconciled with her biological parents in Dec'14. Our hearts are still aching from the loss, but we know that as we trust Adonai with our salvation, so we can trust Him with her future. We welcomed our new 4 year old foster child on 05JUN'15.
This entry was posted in Harsh words to Biological Parents, Parenting with Love, Sharing Experiences. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Time

  1. hettie burger says:

    hi Helouise, sjoe…..n mondvol wat seker uit menige “pleegouer-hart” kon kom. ons klein Zellie is more presies n jaar by ons en ek sidder om te dink aan n tyd wat sy dalk nie by ons gaan wees nie. haar vordering is ongelooflik (vir ons is daar gese sy het dalk n ligte vorm van downsindroom)….sy is die intelligentste mensie wat ek nog ooit teegekom het (daar is wel aspekte soos spraak wat stadig is, maar selfs hier vorder ons goed). sy is so deel van ons lewe en ons lewens is soveel ryker met haar daarin, dat ek dit moeilik vind om die dinge waardeur sy moes gaan voor sy by ons gekom het, te verwerk, te verstaan en dan nog “redes ?” daarin te sien. nee….ek glo my Vader wil he dat ek vir haar regte (om gelukkig te wees en beskerm te word), moet baklei. ons het die 29 ste Oktober die hofsaak vir 2jaar pleegsorg….bid asb dat alles goed sal verloop. vriendelike groete en dankie vir jou. Hettie en Zellie en Hannes natuurlik ook. Date: Fri, 4 Oct 2013 15:58:58 +0000 To: hettiebabbel@hotmail.com

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